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Showing posts with label Darwin Awards; Canadiana; Gaffe; Order of Canada. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Darwin Awards; Canadiana; Gaffe; Order of Canada. Show all posts

Thursday, November 12, 2009

The Whore Derv of Canada

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Here at the invisible truth, we are embarking upon a new chapter. For the next few weeks, or until we get bored with it, or until you help me blow it up into the next interweb sensation and I can quit grad school, we will be devoting a virtual award to various Canadians who we would like to see receive a public spanking. The title of this award is the Whore Derv, a play on both the prestigious Order of Canada awards, and Hors D'ouevres, little bits of deliciousness that can serve as an appetizer for deeper thought. Plus, the award recognizes the extent to which the recipient is willing to really put his or her ass out there on the not-so-free market and compromise most things decent in humanity. The award also recognizes the Darwin Awards as a precursor, although we at the Invisible Truth think it is much more fair to mock the living than the dead, because the living at least have a chance to defend themselves. In the next week or so, I will be working on designing the icon to represent the award, like a little Oscar, only it will be a sexified slutty dervish.


No offense is intended, of course, to those hardworking sex-workers who continue to be denied legitimacy in Canada because of whitebread bourgeois pseudo morality. Too left, you say? We say you're being too stubborn or stupid to think outside of that whole ridiculous spectrum in the first place! Go left, er, I mean West, young thing. Let's not be coy about the whole situation here. You ARE a THING. As soon as you sell your labour on the market, boom! You ARE a THING among other things.

We at The Invisible Truth are looking for both suggestions and submissions. If you want to submit a Whore Derv award speech, we would love to read it and consider it, although I will not guarantee you I will publish it. And if you want to lampoon a figure on the left, that's fine too, but make it funny and intelligent.

Suggestions, queiries, and submissions (in .doc format please) can be sent to trevor.cunnington@gmail.com